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Secret Angiush

It has been a long couple of days. I have been working on my next book, Secret Anguish: My Metal Health Journey and I have had to toss out so much of my book because I realized it would’t help my story at all. It had to do with allergies and asthma and that has nothing to do with mental illness. I think this book may be a novella by the time I’m done weeding everything.

I have a couple of chapters I can keep that do have to deal with mental heals so I’ll start my rewrite from there, and see what I come up with. Hopefully, I’ll have a decent manuscript by the time I’m done.

But I’d better get going while I can. Before my 3 year old son needs something and I’m interrupted,

So I’ll work on what I have ready to use and then I should also consult the journal entries I have from years past and see what information they can provide. Well, I’m off. Best of luck to you if you are editing your manuscript. It’s a tough job so take your time and don’t rush it. So long for now!

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Secret Anguish

Secret Anguish: My Mental Health Journey

Okay so I have really been tackling editing on two books. One I think is pretty good so I’m leaving that one alone. But it’s this one about my mental health, Secret Anguish. I went through it and couldn’t imagine what I was thinking some of the chapters I had included. They just didn’t make any sense. So you know what I did, I axed those suckers right out of the book. That removed 22,000 words from my story but it had to be done. I’m down to a little over 30,000 words now. About the size of my other book.

And then I had to remove other whole pages or whole paragraphs to make sure everything lined up. But now that I’m at the end I’m realizing there is some information I could include that would go with the mental health title. So I am working on adding in some information from my therapy days while I was still in Vermont. And I thought after the move to Maine in 2011 I would add in some things from my stay in the hospital. Those are the only two things I can think of adding right now. Then I’ll probably print my book again and go over it again. Editing just never ends it seems like.

Speaking of editing, do you have a certain way that you edit your work? I really don’t at least nothing methodical. Do you use any books to help you on your way? I have one book but I haven’t read it all yet. There are several articles out there than can help you too if you need help.

Here is one website that will help with editing:

https://www.lisatener.com/2012/02/how-to-edit-a-nonfiction-book-one-step-at-a-time/

Mental Illness and Creativity

Mental Illness & Creativity

Some people think that those with mental illness have this great ability to be creative. Well, I am someone with a mental illness and I can tell you I actually have a hard time being creative. It’s like in my depressed moods all I want to do is stare at a wall or sleep. The last thing I want to do is try to write a story whether fiction or nonfiction. I just lay on the couch having no energy and no motivation.

When I’m hypomanic my mind is so scattered, going from one idea to the next. Whatever I’d write probably wouldn’t make much sense, especially since I don’t sleep much. But this is just me.

I swear having a mental illness makes it harder for me to think, to bring my creativity out. I don’t know that having a mental illness can actually make it harder to be creative. This is just my own person thought because I know I love to write but lately have been having such a hard time getting into my creative flow.

Do any of you notice that having a mental illness makes it harder to be creative? What do you think about my statement?

Feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you.

Reflections of the Heart, Secret Anguish

And Around We Go!

Just last week I wrote a post about shutting down work on my second book Secret Anguish. Well, there have been a change of plans, which I didn’t foresee.

Just yesterday morning I heard back from a literary agent I contacted just last month, and they want to see the first three chapters and a synopsis for Reflections of the Heart (my first book). So what does this have to do with Secret Anguish? Well, I kind of mentioned that I was working on a second book in my query letter, so now I’m like, “Well, what if they want to see work on the second book too?”

And I kept praying about Secret Anguish and if God really wants me to work on this book or not. I keep feeling a draw to write it no matter how difficult it may be emotionally. (I’ll still have to keep a close eye on my mental health.) And I have a LOT of work to do on it. I’m still in the phase of gathering my sources.

So this whole literary agent contacting me asking to see more of one book, has really motivated me to move forward with another book.

We never know just how things are going to turn out when we have several projects going. It’s just amazing how God can turn things around just when you think you’re done with a project, he says, “No, you’re not finished. I need you to work on this and finish it.”

So here I go. I’ve sent off the email to the literary agent with what she’s asked to see. And I’m back hard at work, on Secret Anguish.

I hear my son in his room. He’s up so I must go for now.

Take care and God bless!

Secret Anguish, Uncategorized

Secret Anguish: Update

Months have flown by without a new post springing from my fingers. Life has been pretty busy with the holidays and all. But I have some time to update you all on what my current project is.

I’m working on Secret Anguish which at one point was going to be about gluten sensitivity, or what we thought was gluten sensitivity until we later found out I really didn’t have one. So now I am recycling the title and using for my story on mental illness.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD, unspecified bipolar disorder with psychosis,  generalized anxiety disorder, borderline personality disorder, and depersonalization. And I have been going through journal entries since 2005 trying to piece parts of my life together to make this book.

Well I discovered this morning, a journal that I had handwritten and yet typed up like I had done the others to make copying and pasting sections easier (when I needed to do so such as what part is PTSD related, or anxiety related and so forth). So now I have more work to do on top of what I was doing.

Once I get these journal entries typed up and sorted, I’ll be able to go back and work on piecing my book together. My goal is to have my book out before the end of the year. I’m going to work hard on reaching that goal.

Something else that has come my way is teaching my daughter how to create characters because she would like to write her own books. She is 9 and in third grade so I’m curious to see if this is just a passing phase, or if this is going to grow into something more. Whatever the case, I am having a proud mommy moment for the time being.

What are you working on right now? Is it a new novel or short story, a poem, maybe planning a new blog post? I’d love to hear what your’e up to. Or even if you have questions about what the story I’m working on I’d be happy to answer you.

Have a great day and for others who live elsewhere in Maine, be safe out there. Winter Storm Grayson has started unleashing his fury.